Anyhow, for some reason when I became a wife and mother my body ceased to be my own. It went from a privately held entity to a publicly traded entity.
I am constantly touched, sat upon, tugged, pulled etc.
The focus of today's little laugh is my - ahem - chest. Yep. Hasn't been my own for a while. There is always a little elbow, knee, head or hand poking, pinching, punching or slamming up against my poor chest area. (We won't even get started on the Hubs!)
J-Bear even calls that area of my body "pockets". He is constantly pulling out my shirt and asking if he can tuck a toy away in "you pocket" for safe keeping.
WHY oh WHY!!
Perhaps the best came a couple weeks ago when my Mother-in-law (MIL) was watching my kids. The subject of taking a swim in her condo complex pool came up. My wise MIL knows that my little fiends need mucho adult supervision and doesn't quite feel up to the task of taking them swimming alone. Did I mention she is wise?!
During said discussion Cadie Lu offered up this gem:
"I know, we could take my Dad with us. He's a real good swimmer. He can go underwater and everything. But, my mom, well, see, she has these really big... uh...chest things. And I think the water must hurt them. So she doesn't like to swim."
Oh, ho, ho. If only that were true. Water is the only place were those honkers enjoy the glorious feel of weightlessness. If only she knew that those are the only "big things" on my body that don't give me pain and embarrassment. It's the other "big things" on my body that make swimming an uncomfortable prospect.
Also, I appreciate her discussing my aching bosoms with the family.
But, I suppose that's how it goes with public entities.
3 comments:
Love the pic of the lady squeezing her thighs to get the cottage cheese look. See mine do that all on their own. No squeezing necessary.
I have to admit, I totally thought I was going to get the Aspen opinion on Public vs. Private BLOGS and I was all settled in for a good read. Luckily, your post did not disappoint, even though it was a different topic. How totally awesome that your body parts are discussed publicly! Luckily Susie is a saint and probably totally laughed knowing your hoodlums and their stories.
P.S. Brooklyn now announces that "Mama toots" - I'm so proud! ;)
That gave me a good laugh as I am sitting here breastfeeding.
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