Olly Olly Oxen Free

To my gentle readers:  If you are slightly on the more... shall I say prudish... side (my mom and my sister Emily) this post may make you squirm a bit.  But it's all in good fun, meant to be a laugh.

The other day while cleaning up the kitchen post-bomb (dinner) The Hubs and I overheard the kidlets negotiating a game of tag.  It was amusing, but then The Hubs mumbled something under his breath which took their conversation to the next level.

He said, "Sounds an awful lot like our 'bedroom talk'". 

Confusing?  Maybe.  Had to be there?  Quite possible.  Amusing?  Definitely.

Let me illustrate.

In order to not cast a disparaging light on women everywhere, I will not call our speakers Man and Wife.  Because I've heard rumor that there are women out there who are actually the initiators of such things (seriously, I jest not!)  I'll just call them Aggressor (A) and.... Victim (V)?  Ha ha.

Here, my friends, is how the game of tag, if not viewed but only listened to from another room, can sound suspiciously like a game of, uh, dancing in the sheets.

A: Hey, you wanna play?
V: I don't know, who's gonna be it?
A: Well, I was it last time, so I think it's your turn.
V: I'm not gonna be it. 
A: Fine, I'll be it.  Got you.
V: You can't get me, I was sitting right here in the safe zone.
A: Well, then get out of the safe zone so we can play.
V: I don't really want to play, I already told you that.
A: But, then you said you'd play.  Didn't you mean it?
V: Well, I just didn't want to hurt your feelings, but... whatever.  Fine.
A: Great.  Let's play.  Hey, you have to let me catch you.
V: No, I don't.  Don't you know the rules?
A: But I have to catch you or the game is no fun.
V: I'm having fun.  Catch me if you can.
A: Fine, got you..... Hey, why are you just sitting there doing nothing.
V: I'm frozen.
A: But, we aren't playing that game.
V: I'm always playing that game.
A:  Well, who's going to unfreeze you?
V: I don't know and I don't really care.
A:  This game is no fun at all!
V:  That's what I tried to tell you when you first asked me to play.

As much as I hate to admit it The Hubs was right.  It was amusingly similar.

Okay, let's be honest here.... I don't really hate to admit it.  I'm married.  I have been for 13 years.  The humor and reality of this conversational gem should come as no surprise to someone who's been married for more than 32 days and 10 hours. 

The good news is that now I don't have to say "No" when The Hubs suggests a game. 

I just have to say "Olly Olly Oxen Free".