The other night Steve decided to treat his harried wife (that’s me) to dinner out. Now this decision isn’t without its ramifications. We often have to weigh out the terror of taking our children to a public place vs. the horror of having to cook at home and clean it up. This particular evening Steve stumbled upon the perfect blend of private dining outside the home: Sonic. (Woot, woot!)
While we were sitting in the car waiting for our food the girls were getting restless. Steve was quick to spot an opportunity ripe for teaching.
Steve: Hey girls, wanna play a game?Girls: Ya!! (They still cheer when he asks this question. Which isn’t smart!)
Steve: Cool. Come up closer to me and we’ll play a game called “Sniff This”.
Those poor fools cheered and scrambled over the car seats to get up front.
Steve: I’ll go first. Sniff this! (He holds up a sock that he’s somehow managed to work off his nasty foot without anyone noticing.)
Ms. Els: Gross Daddy!
Cadie Lu: Oooohhhhh!
Steve: Fine. Wanna play another game?
Girls: No!
Lesson learned. If someone asks you to smell something, you run away.
Steve has imparted this type of practical lesson time and time again. Some of his classics include: Pull My Finger, 54 Card Pick Up, Burp-n-Blow, and Dodge This.
Perhaps one of my very favorites happened last night. It wasn’t quite close enough to bed time, the natives were restless and Steve was desperate for some quiet.
Steve: Hey girls, wanna play a game?Girls: Ya!!! (WHY??!!!)
Steve: Let’s play “Kick This”.
Girls: Cool, what do we do?
Steve: We run around and if I kick you, you have to go to bed!
Girls: Okay! (WHY??!!!)
They started running and sure enough Steve caught up and delivered a soft kick to each of their bums.
Ms. Els: Daddy, I don’t like this game!
Cadie Lu: I don’t want to go to bed!
Steve: Well, then you should ask more questions before you just agree to something!
Steve = 1 Kids = 0 
Someday we’re going to have some very savvy (if not wary) children. And we’ll owe it all to Steve!
2 comments:
Just the laugh I needed today. I will not let Marty read this however as I don't need him coming up with any more ideas as to torture our children with. :)
P.S. I mistakenly told Marty about this...he introduced the girls to "The Fartivator" that very night. How does one play this? You run around and try not to let daddy fart on your head. Just lovely isn't it?
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